What is Step-parent adoption?
An application to the Isle of Man High Court by the birth parent of a child together with their married partner to adopt that child, so he/she becomes legally the child of the new relationship and so that both adoptive parents share parental rights equally.
Frequently asked questions
1. Do my partner and I have to be married for him to adopt my son?
Under the Isle of Man Adoption Act 1984, you and your partner DO have to be married for a step-parent adoption to take place. Your relationship has to be of sufficient length to demonstrate to the court that it is stable.
2. My son has just turned 18 and wants my husband to adopt him before he turns 21. Is this possible?
No. An adoption order can only be granted when the young person is under the age of 18.
3. Why do I have to adopt my own child?
The adoption law in the Isle of Man (The Adoption Act 1984) currently says that the birth parent making an application with a new partner has to adopt their own child for parental responsibility to be shared jointly. In some other countries, only the new parent applies to adopt, but this is not the case in the Isle of Man.
Some birth parents find it very hard to give up their rights as the parent who has created the child to become their adoptive parent. The implication of this (emotionally as well as legally) is an area which the visiting social worker will help you explore.
4. My husband has been part of our family since my son was a toddler. Do I have to tell him that the man he calls Dad is not his real father?
If your child is old enough to understand, then you will need to talk to him about how your family is made up. This will involve telling him about his other birth parent, and how you and your husband came to be together, and why you want to adopt him now.
Part of the social worker’s report to the Court will need to address this. The report needs to indicate how well the child understands what is happening – and whether he agrees to being adopted by you and your husband.
The report will also cover how much contact the child’s father has had with your family, and whether he has ever supported the child financially. Your child’s views about contact with this side of his family will also need to be taken into consideration.
5. I haven’t seen my child’s father for years, and only have a “care of” address for him. Will that stop or hold up the adoption?
We have a duty to try and find your child’s absent birth parent if at all possible, to ask his opinion about whether the adoption order should be made. We have to demonstrate to the Court that we have made efforts to locate him and seek his views.
If he wishes to contest the application, he can do so, and we would then recommend that you both seek legal advice and assistance.
If you and he were married previously, or he has shared parental responsibility with you, he will have to be asked to give his formal consent in writing. Even if he does not hold parental responsibility, currently under Manx adoption law (and under the proposed European Convention law relating to the adoption of children), his views will still need to be sought, and a request made to him for his consent to the child’s adoption. The court may choose to dispense with his consent if the Deemster feels he is withholding his consent unreasonably, or he cannot be found.
Similarly, if your child has a legal Guardian, that Guardian will also have to give his consent in writing.
6. My son has occasional phone calls from his father’s parents and when we go over to the UK we occasionally visit them. Does this mean we cannot adopt?
If there is an agreement between you for contact that works well (verbal or written), and the child understands (and wants) the adoption application to be granted so his step-father can become his legal father, then the court will consider whether this is in his best interests. Each individual set of circumstances will be considered, which is why the court requires a detailed report about all of your circumstances and individual opinions.
The court will occasionally make a contact order attached to the adoption order to ensure that contact continues with significant members of the child’s birth family. Usually though, if the contact is amicable, the court will trust that you and your ex-partner will keep to the agreement (for the benefit of your child).
7. How often will you visit and who will you need to see?
The social worker will visit you at least three times, and will want to see all members of the family who will be affected by the granting of the adoption order. This will include you, your partner, the child, any other children living in the family (or visiting regularly) and any other significant members of either family. The social worker will also need to contact the absent parent and obtain his and his family’s views as part of their report. The court allows the social worker 12 weeks to complete all his enquiries and write his report.
8. How do I go about applying?
Click here to view our other step-parent information which gives you a step-by-step guide to the process of applying to adopt.
9. What if I have other questions?
Please contact us and we will try to help you. The process at this stage feels complicated. Often having someone sit with you and explain the various stages and requirements can make the stages feel less daunting. |
